It all began with a request for legalization of a customary marriage made by a couple from the Tokarara Christian Fellowship.
Following their first meeting, Dr. Julian R. Kivori, the Center Director for Ellel Ministries PNG and Lead Pastor of Tokarara Christian Fellowship (TCF), recommended that they attend a series of marriage seminars prior to their official signing ceremony.
Time Out for Marriage, a marriage education series, was born out of this.
Dr. Kivori stated in the event flyer that as marriages and families face challenges, storms, and brokenness, there is a great need for healing, restoration, and a rebuilding of godly values and foundation in today’s society.
Time Out for Marriage course, which used a healing, restoration, and deliverance approach, included weekly activities and exercises designed especially for couples and covered topics such as God’s plan for marriage, the impact of past trauma both before and after marriage, how to express emotions, build trust, have a talk about sex, and hope for the future.
Just 46 of the 56 couples who reserved a spot for the course actually paid the tuition. Only 41 of the 46 couples finished the course, and on September 7, 2024, at Tokarara Christian Fellowship, Koura Way, 15 of those couples had their traditional marriages formally recognized.
The oldest couple had been customarily married for more than 33 years, while the youngest had been customarily married for more than two years.
Pastor Julian said apart from the Civil Registry marriage requirements, couples from other denominations were required to provide a consent letter from their church leadership approving their customary marriage to be solemnized by a Baptist minister.
In this way, the interdenominational relationships were maintained while ministering to the need of the wider Body of Christ for couples who were married by custom.
At the end of the Marriage Papers Signing Ceremony, the TCF congregational Chairman, Ganjiki Wayne, cited the legal implications of a lawful marriage.
As a practicing lawyer, Wayne explained that the term “lawful” husband or wife was a loaded term denoting not just a romantic relationship but a legal one.
He said that the seriousness or sacredness of a legal relationship was found in its termination or “exit clauses”.
“In marriage, there are two modes of termination: Death and Divorce.”
“Once a spouse dies, the marriage has ended. But divorce is complicated. God says He hates divorce.”
“So, when marriage was created by law, State followed God’s attitude and made divorce extremely difficult and cumbersome.”
“Therefore, entering into a relationship that has very serious exit clauses is a serious decision.”
Wayne said that the “exit clauses” for de facto relationships or even customary marriages were not as difficult and complicated as legal marriage.
He concluded that it takes a real man and a real woman to make this decision.
Meiva Lalatute, a participant of the course, expressed her gratitude.
“As the days are approaching, I feel so thankful for all the teaching during the course.”
“I never thought this day would come for me to make it right before the Lord. I know and believe that this ceremony will come with the blessings that I’ve been waiting for so long.”
“Thank you so much TCF and Elle Ministries. We’re truly blessed by your act of kindness from the start of the course till the end today.”
“What an amazing journey, it came straight from the heart with so much love and kindness shown.”
For marriage counselling or other prayer counselling matters, you can contact TCF and or Ellel Ministries on infopng@ellel.org or citychurchtcf@gmail.com.